Growing up in a war torn country.

I was born in 1969, in a country called Lebanon. At the time, it was a beautiful and vibrant small country where people of various religions lived in harmony. In 1975, a civil war started in Lebanon which lasted 17 years.

The first year or so of the war, my parents tried to cope and live normally. I had a brother and a baby sister at the time. My memory consists of days off school because the area of our school was being shelled or because snipers were targeting that route. I also remember changing school halfway through the year, to a closer one which meant less risk of getting bombed. These are some of the ways my parents coped. There were days that we slept in the hallway in our house and watched the shelling through a distant window, as though it was fireworks. Depending on how loud it was, we began to estimate how close it was – a coping mechanism of making the situation entertaining. For us children, we coped with laughter and play in the hallway, but we were scared.

When the bombing was heavy and close, all the residents of the building went to the bomb shelter which was underground, and lived there together. Our parents played cards to make the time go by, and strategized how to get food to everyone – another coping mechanism. Politics and death tolls were common conversation; which we would imitate in an attempt to cope and understand. Children also coped by playing together and it was often soldiers and battle fields pretend play.

One of the days or weeks that we lived in our hallway, it was declared that there would be a cease fire for a few hours in the daytime, so I remember the adults deciding which father would go get bread for everyone. My father volunteered and I remember how worried I was. These strategies and collaboration of taking turns to minimize risk were coping mechanisms, and they were functional but not without psychosocial effects.

A year and a half into the war, my father decided that we had to leave the country since it was getting worse. I remember vividly how we were woken up and carried one night into a special taxi which the snipers did not target. My father placed a mattress inside the car on the back window, in case we did get shot at; as though that would have helped. Scared as can be, we were driven to a pier where we boarded a boat full of refugees like us, and we sailed off to Cyprus. How we coped during that boat ride was not so well; some got sea sick, some wet themselves and I cried.

That is my memory of living briefly in the war, the second part to my story is living as a refugee, a foreigner and then an immigrant; which I call living the war but on the outside.

My family coped by being close to friends and family. In Cyprus, we stayed with friends for over a month. After that, we flew to England and stayed with my uncle for over 6 months. There was no external support for myself or my siblings or my parents, except the welcoming support of my uncle and his wife. We all had to be patient and tolerant, and I think I personally just dealt with things day by day. We became close and protective of each other too. I did remain timid and insecure whenever I changed schools. In England, my brother cried in school every day and I just bottled it up and tried to learn English. Coping was staying out of trouble since four of us had to sleep in one room, and two families shared one bathroom.

The consequences of the war on my family include depression, eating disorders, obsessive compulsive disorders, insecurity, Tourette's syndrome and phobias; all dominantly psychosocial. The ways we coped is first by immigrating and then by being together and supporting each other. Remaining close to friends and family who understood the experience was also a great support.

The Syrian Civil War

As most of you have heard, the country neighboring Lebanon is currently at war, and the devastating impact on the children of Syria is significant. In 2013, the UN estimated that 100,000 had been killed and 2.4million had been registered as refugees in neighboring countries, of which 3/4 are women and children (CBC, 2014). Children living in Syria are living in danger of being killed, kidnapped, recruited to fight or tortured; and refugee children are living in difficult circumstances with poor access to shelter, food, health and education.

On a visit to Lebanon where almost one million Syrians are refugees, Angelina Jolie recently said "meeting these children was a heart-rending experience,… They have lost their families and their childhood has been hijacked by war. They are so young, yet they are bearing the burdens of their reality as if they are adults" (Time, 2014). Her brief statement can be seen on http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/middleeast/lebanon/10658101/Angelina-Jolie-thanks-Lebanon-for-assisting-Syrian-refugees.html

There are numerous organizations attempting to minimize the harm done to children inside and outside Syria; and they include the United Nations, The International Red Cross and Red Crescent, Save the Children, the International Rescue Committee and many many more.

Syrian Children in refugee camps ( UNHCR, 2013)

Their support ranges from diapers for babies, to clean water, to school supplies, to medications, medical supplies and artificial limbs, not to mention food and shelter. Some organizations are setting up centers for women and children, others are providing caravans equipped toys and educational material, others offer financial aid on a monthly basis, and the Lebanese government has accommodated the refugees with education and health services. Other countries are sending funds and support for the refugees in Lebanon, Jordan and Turkey; which hopefully benefits the children as much as possible. It is up to these host countries to regulate the support distribution.

Inside Syria, the aid is not able to reach everyone. The UN and the Red Cross/red Crescent are doing everything they can to reach needy and injured Syrians who are still in Syria, which includes many children. Their effort is simply to provide safety and medical care, and any basic needs.

Child being carried out of rubble.

From my child protection training, I am aware that one of the situations that increases the risk of child abuse and trafficking is war. Children are orphaned or homeless or parents are desperate – making them and easy targets for predators. There are thousands of Syrian orphans and these children are currently such prey, but unfortunately their own country is not protecting them. I have not found any organization that is addressing child protection from this angle, for the Syrian children.

The current efforts to minimize the harm done to Syrian children depends on the host countries for the refugees, on the financial aid from international countries and on the NGOs involved.

References

http://www.cbc.ca/news2/interactives/syria-dashboard/

http://world.time.com/2014/02/24/angelina-jolie-visits-syrian-refugees/

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/middleeast/lebanon/10658101/Angelina-Jolie-thanks-Lebanon-for-assisting-Syrian-refugees.html

http://www.unhcr.org/515adb0a9.html